I am an expert on all things faith, ministry and church related. How is that you may ask? Well, I am a preachers kid so of course I know all there is to know about growing up with God. I guess you can call it spiritual nobility. I am an official member via some sort of occupational birth right. Okay, of course I am being facetious here but this post is based on my experience of growing up in church life. So I had to point out the obvious that I know all there is to know about growing up with God and His people. (I am sorry but my sarcasm sometimes over takes my writing.)
So what profound knowledge can I pass on to all of you about the Christian life? Here it is in a nutshell. My whole life I have grappled with what it means to be a follower of Christ. I have tried to figure out what indeed is the perfect church to attend. I have even tried to find that “calling” on my life that preachers have spoken of, feeling like I might have missed it at every turn. You would think that with my spiritual nobility I would have found it by now but I still question that calling of God on my life.
My upbringing has made it is quite easy to get jaded about Christianity. I have had my fair share of ugliness in the church. I have questioned God and His people and how many of them are no different than the secular world. My opinion about the Church has brought lows and highs and at times made me question the purpose of attending all together. I have even looked back at my own conversations and relationships and felt like I have failed God with my personal testimony. It is depressing to know that almost 40 years of being a Christian can bring such doubts and insecurities in my walk with Christ. Then it hit me the other day. I am exactly where God wants me to be.
I realized that my life long questions, insecurities and doubts are the basis of my walk with Christ. God does not want me to be settled and comfortable in my Christian walk. He wants me to keep searching and reaching for more of Him. He challenges me to constantly trust Him for all my many questions on this faith walk that I decided to take long ago. So I guess I am no expert on Christianity, God and His believers. In fact, I have learned that there are no faith experts in the Christian world. Anyone who sells you a brand of neat and polished Christianity, with all the answers, is way too comfortable in their religious state. If we truly have chosen to follow Christ then we will be constantly growing and searching for answers to those many God questions. The only security we have is our salvation. God doesn’t want me to be simply a member of His club but a follower willing to work on this relationship and grow more and more in love with Him.