Archives For Feminism

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I still can’t get those images out of my head. Women were marching on Washington clad in vagina suits and pink pussy hats. Just writing that sentence irks me. Am I really raising my daughters in this rude society of women?

The words of Ashley Judd’s speech at the women’s march on January 21, 2017, still have me shaking my head in disbelief. She recited a poem from a nineteen-year-old expressing outrage about our current president. The poem railed against Trump’s past vulgar remarks, ironically, with equal poetic vulgarity. It ended like this, “Our p__sies are for our pleasure. They are birthing new generations of filthy, vulgar, nasty, proud, Christian, Muslim, Buddhist, Sikh, you name it for new generations of nasty women.”

Me: No, thank you!

Modern-day feminism has resorted to crassness instead of respectfulness. Women who call out injustices, inequalities and a man’s vulgar remarks with equal vulgarity…well, I guess feminism has risen to the occasion.

Today’s women’s movement uses celebrity platforms of women who think they speak for all of us. Their political and social opinions wrapped in hatred, anger, and crying out for justice that looks more like self-centered relativism. It’s not the generation of women I want to raise my daughters in. I am not nasty, and I refuse to raise a generation of vulgar females because it is not who God created women to be.

I recently did a study on the book of Ruth amidst all of the recent news on women’s speeches and marches. Now juxtapose this recent news with Ruth’s story, and you might be able to find the humor in it with me. Modern-day women who are screaming about their inequalities and then there’s Ruth; who loses her husband and her only means of income in a culture that does not treat women with equal footing as men.

Yes, yes, it was a different time and place in history, but you have to look at this woman and realize there is a reason her story is set aside as a complete book of the Bible. She is the exact opposite of the characteristics that define modern-day feminism. She was humble, selfless, giving, honest, hard-working, and defined love as serving others over her needs. You don’t find Ruth on a platform screaming about her “rights” that have not been afforded to her. Instead, she’s picking up scraps of grain behind harvesters so that she and her mother-in-law would have food to eat.

If you have never read the book of Ruth, I won’t give the story away. You have to read it to understand that charity defined her life and eventually, it was her selflessness that redeemed her widow’s story. A redemption story that ultimately would become a divine legacy.

The story of Ruth is really about what it means to be a generation of women who follow Christ. It celebrates womanhood amidst the struggles of life and real injustice. There are no words of self-empowerment, filth, vulgarity, or pride. Ruth is the very definition of what I want to teach my daughters to be in this nasty woman’s world.

Women who use their talents and strengths to serve others.

Women who find worth and value in their relationship with Christ.

Women who see humility as a strength and not a weakness.

Women who value their sex with virtue and respect.

Women who celebrate life and the God-given miracle of carrying a child in her womb or in her adoptive arms.

Women who celebrate their differences with men and find equality in those differences.

Women who don’t strive for perfection but emulate grace through all the struggles and imperfections of life.

I know that raising my daughters in the philosophy of Christianity over modern-day feminism is not popular. It’s turning away from all things progressive and marching against a tide of women who will look down on them and probably ridicule them. I don’t care! We will not be judged or known by how loud we scream and our “performance” in this secular world. Instead, like Ruth, if we follow the call of Christ in our lives, we will be known for our charity and humility.

I have this t-shirt that says, “Ruth. Mary. Sarah. Esther. #Squad Goals.” It’s a reminder of the women I want to emulate in my life. Biblical representations of women who followed Christ in a culture that often rejected the things of God. I am nowhere near imitating the selfless characteristics of Ruth. She’s a squad goal, but she’s also my hopes and dreams for a future generation of women, especially the young women I am raising.

I’ll keep wearing my biblical #squad goals t-shirt against the tide of pink p__sy hats. It might not be popular, but I’d much rather carry the title of a follower of Christ than a feminist.

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Olympic gold medalist Kerri Walsh Jennings was previously interviewed by NBC about her professional beach volleyball career and her fourth chance to win the gold medal in Rio. Media outlets are highlighting her comments because she’s pro-family and pro-babies. Walsh said in the interview, “I feel like I was born to have babies and play volleyball.”

Shocking, right?

She even went so far as to say, “I’d love to win a fourth gold medal and I’d love to have a fourth baby.”

Four children…Wow!

Okay, if you can’t detect in my writing here, I am being a bit snarky. Let me explain why.

I am a huge advocate of life in the womb, out of the womb, and for celebrating motherhood. I understand Kerri’s comments because I too, feel like I was born to have babies. God gave me three of them and they changed my life.

Kerri commented: “Before I had more kids, I was like, this feels trivial. I’d been playing for so long, and I was like I need balance. All my eggs are in this one basket and it’s very self-centered and self-focused. They gave me that perspective and balance I thought I was missing. It took my game and my desire and my passion for life to the next level. I am hugely indebted to my children.”

A-ha! That revelation after we have children that the world no longer revolves around us because we are too busy raising these precious babies. It’s one of the greatest joys of being a parent when we realize that giving up of ourselves actually makes us happier human beings.

Now Kerri’s comments aren’t controversial. Yes, they do contradict some of modern-day feminism with putting careers before children and the whole “choice” mantra. There was some push back on Twitter from her comments. But who cares? She’s celebrating life. Three of them to be exact and maybe a fourth in her future.

Media outlets are now taking her words and labeling them with titles like, Liberals Go Nuts When Kerri Walsh Jennings Says… or USA Volleyball Star Makes Comment about “Having Babies” That’s Pretty Ballsy in This Day and Age. They are catchy titles meant to grab the reader but they are dishonest to Kerri’s comments who was simply sharing her life story.

As a writer, I have been guilty of this grab and attack technique. Someone celebrates our passion and we put labels on them to prove a point. I once called myself an anti-feminist because I disagreed so much with the feminist movement. I have written articles against feminism and I was even invited onto a radio program because I was a self-proclaimed “anti-feminist.” Then I realized something. Labels, catchy phrases, and shocking titles are not needed to define who I am. My life and the way I live it speaks for itself. I don’t want to be known for what I am against. I want to be known for what I celebrate.

That’s the thing that needs to change in our society and among us as women who celebrate the miracle of life, children, and motherhood. Just do your thing! Be a mother, celebrate your blessings, and even express how your children have added to your profession or career. Don’t define or label yourself how you’re different from women who don’t share your same perspective in life. Yes, you might get some push back from feminists who believe differently but don’t sweat it. Just be you and you will shine. You don’t have to win a gold medal to figure that one out.

I love Kerri’s comments but there was something that she said that wasn’t highlighted. She remarked, “My priorities are faith, family, and my career.” Now that’s balance and for those of us who share those same priorities let’s share the joy in that kind of living. That’s the woman God has called me to be and I am going to promote it- no labels needed.